back?

mar 15, 2025
i am feeling better!

this morning i decided to wake up early. i made a breakfast bagel to take with me, and drove up to this mountain pavilion. i drive past it almost everyday on my way to school. i got there as the sun was barely rising, and ate breakfast. it was a little chilly. lots of birds flitting about. saw lots of american robins, which made me happy. i honestly expected there to be way less people, but there were about 15 cars parked?? and at 7 in the morning?? once i finished my breakfast i discovered that theres actually a five mile trail that starts from there and circles back around. i hiked it for maybe 30 minutes before coming back to my car. it was pretty steep! the air was so nice though...
since i was already feeling pretty good about myself, i decided to check out the other trailhead just down the road. its up the other side of the mountain. i decided against hiking up this one, and instead had a very awkward conversation with the lady at the park center desk in which i was just saying words. but all in all, very nice. driving back i saw lots of cows and horses.

i decided last night that i wanted today to be without my phone. so far im succeeding in this task. i feel way better. ive gotten some drawing done, which ill upload soon.

yesterday i continued my p5r ng+ game.. its been a while since i played, so while i remember the bigger plotlines, finer details are foggy. it really feels like rediscovering my love for the game again. all the characters suddenly have an added depth to them... i forgot how mean sojiro is to akiren at the start lolol. i also never Truly realized how selfless ryuji is! at the very very start, when he doesnt even know akiren, he literally runs at and shoves all the guards just so akiren can escape? memorizing all the volleyball players faces - even though he knows fully well that these exact people have probably shunned him after the track accident? i love ryuji im so glad i share a birthday with him. also. morgana is not that bad.

mar 12, 2025
i always forget how real seasonal depression is. its been 25 degrees (celsius) for a couple days now and suddenly theres light in my life again. thank god its already wednesday. the daffodils in our front yard are blooming again. birds are singing!!! i didnt realize how much i missed them..

monday and tuesday were a little hectic so i didnt have time to write about my weekend. it was really nice! visited a local store that sells jp products and they had takoyaki!! it was my first time trying it and i didnt expect to like it so much. the same place also had a couple gachapons and ofc i did the bird one. got my fav pick first try :3 you'll see it in the cheesecake pic. vv cute sparrow!!! bringing it with me on test days for good luck.


on sunday i went to a friends birthday party... we did an escape room and were Horribly bad at it. the lady monitoring our room was super nice and kept giving us discreet hints lol. there was a gundam store next to the escape room place with a life size model. [i didnt buy anything (sadly). i think the spirit of buddhism is coming after me because ive been lacking in my worldly desires. i havent spent money on anything miscelleanous since christmas.. and that was for gifts... ough.] then we went to a pho place that was super good.. pho tai my love. i managed to almost finish the bowl! for dessert, we ordered a green tea cheesecake with matcha ice cream... it was so good you cant even imagine... the cheesecake was a little thicker than usual and you could really taste the green tea. eating a slice with a little whipped cream and icecream in combo... wow...



mar 8, 2025
oughhh persona.. persona...... persona......
akechi goro in p5x i Cannot wait for it to localize. I LOVE GACHA SLOP!!!!! p5x has an actual proper rhythm game. none of that overstimulating circle shit like p5d. splendid.. i also like wonders character design + a couple others. i think its confirmed it'll localize, just no set date on when. aaaah.....
starting up persona5 strikers again. goddd i love this game. the opening song is So good. axe to grind. wow. i love you phantom thieves.

mar 5, 2025
whenever i think i have it hard i'm like Wait. Goro Akechi ... that dude was balancing being a student / tv star / detective / assassin. if his gay ass can juggle that i can do anything. i'm over exaggerating it's only like four things but they're all so Serious... i'm doing the stuff i thought would be hard when i was younger. oughhh... college job education school test college think drive apply drive ougghhh..

mar 3, 2025
i cannot believe it is march... three months into the year already. only two more months until this school year ends. crazy scary. i'll have to figure out what to do with my time in the summer. i'm thinking of volunteering for this horse camp i used to go to when i was younger. i work well enough with kids, and being outside all day with the horses is not as bad as younger me thought it was. i miss it a lot during the year. thinking of the barn and stable, of walking the horses back to their pastures.. splendid.
other than that, i might apply for this criminal investigations program at a local college, but i'm not sure if i'll get in. i hope i do! it'll be nice to feel as if i'm actually doing somethings Important and Proper and Contributing to my education.

today was nice. very light in terms of schoolwork. have started wearing my glasses again recently. did Not realize how bad my left eye was getting in terms of eyesight.. ough