back?
mar 25, 2025
ok suddenly i have a lot i have to do before like. Thursday
but it is ok i can manage bc theres a Lot of time in a day.
arguably too much to even notice.
i am leaving for vacation thursday midday. long road trip
(part of which i will be driving!). so before then i need to
pack. and finish like three assignments. It ok. i have to
write and perform a speech on whatever topic i want which is
hard because i struggle a lot in open ended assignments. im
a fish out of water... flailing around... but i am trying my
best!
mar 23, 2025
hihiii its been a while! this weekend i am crazy sick. like
i genuinely dont think ive had a stream of consciousness before
sitting down to type this... im extremely lethargic and i cant
really Do anything without wanting to lay down.. ough.
meanwhile: been thinking about persona 5 a lot. all the phantom
thieves... akechi goro... also thinking about persona 4. atlus
registered the domain for p4re.jp a couple days ago. before p3reload
was announced, they registered the domain p3re.jp about 3 months earlier.
when people were saying we'd get persona 4 remake before persona 6
i genuinely thought they were joking. not so funny now is it.. i
need to finish p4g Actually. i miss it. ive been told im very
similar to yosuke. plus hes orange!!!!!!!! like the one video game
character whose thematic color is orange!!!! my favorite!!!!! and
he has Headphones. epic....
mar 17, 2025
am trying to go to sleep earlier today...
yesterday was quite uneventful. i really only left the house
to get food. my hair was greasy, so i threw on a baseball cap
to hide it. when i left the house i got scared bc like.. what if
it isnt baseball cap weather yet and i look like an Idiot.
on the drive there tho i counted 11 other people wearing caps,
so that calmed me down. this is going to sound very stupid when
i write it down, but ive recently noticed that i have a bad habit
of looking at my feet while walking. i attempted to remedy this
somewhat at the store - practicing looking people in the eye while
walking. slow steps, but at least theyre in the right direction!
while a home yesterday i finally had the chance to play synthesis,
a p5r fangame. it was really good! the entire time i was really
just awed at the amount of love put into it. ive long been someone
who never really contributes anything to fandoms - not 2 be a debbie
downer or anything, but im not particularly creative, nor do i have
the brains for theories or headcanons and the like! but maybe i dont
really have to have those things... maybe the love for the
media is enough to spur me to creation...
mar 15, 2025
i am feeling better!
this morning i decided to wake up early. i made a breakfast
bagel to take with me, and drove up to this mountain pavilion.
i drive past it almost everyday on my way to school. i got there
as the sun was barely rising, and ate breakfast. it was a little
chilly. lots of birds flitting about. saw lots of american robins,
which made me happy. i honestly expected there to be way less people,
but there were about 15 cars parked?? and at 7 in the morning?? once
i finished my breakfast i discovered that theres actually a five mile
trail that starts from there and circles back around. i hiked it
for maybe 30 minutes before coming back to my car. it was pretty steep!
the air was so nice though...
since i was already feeling pretty good about myself, i decided
to check out the other trailhead just down the road. its up the other
side of the mountain. i decided against hiking up this one, and instead
had a very awkward conversation with the lady at the park center desk
in which i was just saying words. but all in all, very nice. driving back
i saw lots of cows and horses.
i decided last night that i wanted today to be without my phone. so
far im succeeding in this task. i feel way better. ive gotten some
drawing done, which ill upload soon.
yesterday i continued my p5r ng+ game.. its been a while since i played,
so while i remember the bigger plotlines, finer details are foggy. it really
feels like rediscovering my love for the game again. all the characters
suddenly have an added depth to them... i forgot how mean sojiro
is to akiren at the start lolol. i also never Truly realized how selfless
ryuji is! at the very very start, when he doesnt even know akiren, he
literally runs at and shoves all the guards just so akiren can escape?
memorizing all the volleyball players faces - even though he knows fully
well that these exact people have probably shunned him after the track accident?
i love ryuji im so glad i share a birthday with him. also. morgana is
not that bad.
mar 12, 2025
i always forget how real seasonal depression is. its been
25 degrees (celsius) for a couple days now and suddenly theres
light in my life again. thank god its already wednesday. the
daffodils in our front yard are blooming again. birds are singing!!!
i didnt realize how much i missed them..
monday and tuesday were a little hectic so i didnt have time
to write about my weekend. it was really nice! visited a local
store that sells jp products and they had takoyaki!! it was my
first time trying it and i didnt expect to like it so much. the
same place also had a couple gachapons and ofc i did the bird one.
got my fav pick first try :3 you'll see it in the cheesecake pic.
vv cute sparrow!!! bringing it with me on test days for good luck.
on sunday i went to a friends birthday party... we did an
escape room and were Horribly bad at it. the lady monitoring
our room was super nice and kept giving us discreet hints lol.
there was a gundam store next to the escape room place with a life
size model. [i didnt buy anything (sadly). i think the spirit of buddhism
is coming after me because ive been lacking in my worldly desires.
i havent spent money on anything miscelleanous since christmas.. and
that was for gifts... ough.]
then we went to a pho place that was super good.. pho tai my love.
i managed to almost finish the bowl! for dessert, we ordered a
green tea cheesecake with matcha ice cream... it was so good
you cant even imagine... the cheesecake was a little thicker
than usual and you could really taste the green tea. eating a
slice with a little whipped cream and icecream in combo... wow...
mar 8, 2025
oughhh persona.. persona...... persona......
akechi goro in p5x i Cannot wait for it to localize. I
LOVE GACHA SLOP!!!!! p5x has an actual proper rhythm game.
none of that overstimulating circle shit like p5d. splendid..
i also like wonders character design + a couple others.
i think its confirmed it'll localize, just no set date on
when. aaaah.....
starting up persona5 strikers again. goddd i love this game.
the opening song is So good. axe to grind. wow. i love you
phantom thieves.
mar 5, 2025
whenever i think i have it hard i'm like Wait. Goro Akechi
... that dude was balancing being a student / tv star /
detective / assassin. if his gay ass can juggle that i
can do anything. i'm over exaggerating it's only like four
things but they're all so Serious... i'm doing the stuff
i thought would be hard when i was younger. oughhh...
college job education school test college think drive
apply drive ougghhh..
mar 3, 2025
i cannot believe it is march... three months
into the year already. only two more months until this
school year ends. crazy scary. i'll have to figure out
what to do with my time in the summer. i'm thinking of
volunteering for this horse camp i used to go to when
i was younger. i work well enough with kids, and being
outside all day with the horses is not as bad as younger
me thought it was. i miss it a lot during the year.
thinking of the barn and stable, of walking the horses
back to their pastures.. splendid.
other than that, i might apply for this criminal
investigations program at a local college, but i'm not
sure if i'll get in. i hope i do! it'll be nice to
feel as if i'm actually doing somethings Important
and Proper and Contributing to my education.
today was nice. very light in terms of schoolwork.
have started wearing my glasses again recently.
did Not realize how bad my left eye was getting in
terms of eyesight.. ough